by Anna Brotherson
Jesus,
Did you ever wake up in the morning and forget, for a second, where you were?
Did you ever get a thrill down the back of your spine when you realised you’d actually done it — actually come to earth and lived among us?
Does it all feel like a dream to you now?
Do you ever imagine the life you didn’t choose — the one where you didn’t come to us?
And if you do imagine it, how do you feel? Are you glad you chose Earth?
And now, Lord — do you miss it?
Do you remember the first time you ate warm bread dipped in olive oil?
Do you miss the feeling of sand between your toes?
(Have you made plans for sand in the place you’re preparing?)
Do hot tears run down your cheeks when you remember the ones you loved, who are no longer with you?
Is there anything there that reminds you of here?
Does anyone there talk about here?
Is there anyone there who has felt anything like what you have, who has experienced here like you have?
Does anyone there feel like you feel when the topic of first-century Judea comes up?
Did you know it would feel like this, after all had been done?
Do you miss it?
Despite the pain, despite the cost and the loss, the dirt and the sin — do you miss it in any way?
Do you have a few bits & pieces up there to remind you of it?
Do you wish you had more?
Or, are you able to just look ahead — look to the day when all the best of it is back — the bread, the sand, the warm hand of a friend on your shoulder, the affectionate hospitality of women, the laughter of children, the breeze, the birds, the splash of water on your face?
Are you busy rebuilding all that now? Does it take your mind off the loss?
(Is that what I’m supposed to do now?)
Were you, like me, relieved and yet desperately sad to leave, that day when you went “home”?
Does home feel like home to you now?
(It doesn’t, for me.)
Now that you’ve been here with us, eaten with us, touched us, loved us — can you bear the wait until we’re together again?
(I’m not sure I can.)
Would you do it all again?
(I would, in an instant.)
Was it worth it?
~~~~~~~~~~
Originally from Tasmania, Australia, Anna spent nine years living and working in a big city in Southeast Asia, along with her husband Derek and their three children. In early 2020 they moved to Sydney, Australia, where Anna spends her days taking care of her family, teaching Biblical Greek at Sydney Missionary & Bible College, and helping women as a childbirth doula. Anna is the author of Lewis’s Interesting Life, a picture book for TCKs.
