The life of a global worker comes with an unending stream of internal (and sometimes external) questions. Every aspect of our lives bears an immense amount of weight; it often seems that nothing is trivial. These questions, and the decisions that follow them, can wear even the strongest believers down over time.
Is it culture?
Is it sin?
Can I follow this leader?
Should we leave?
Is this still the work I’m called to?
Where should our kids go to school?
Should we give this person money?
Do I need to address this situation, or is it fine?
Is this counsel I’m receiving wise?
Can I say this on social media?
Where do you want us, Lord?
How are we to discern all these things, when often there isn’t a clear right or wrong option? How do we know which way to turn, or who to follow, when it’s just not as black and white as we’d like it to be?
A few years ago, when struggling in the midst of a challenging interpersonal situation, I was given this advice: when discerning something tricky, look for the fruit of the Spirit, and follow it.
This advice has held me through unthinkable scenarios.
When Jesus told the disciples that he was leaving, they were distraught. How were they to know where to go, how to live, what their tasks should be? Jesus consoled them, telling them not to be afraid or dismayed, because he was sending someone even greater: the Holy Spirit. Jesus told the disciples that this was actually better for them than being with him, because the Spirit was always with them, no matter the circumstance.
Galatians 5:25 tells us that “The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.” These principles can guide us in our discernment when we find ourselves in areas of grey. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom (2 Corinthians 3:17). When we are in a situation we don’t understand, faced with a decision that seems impossible to discern, or wondering where on earth we are to go next (sometimes literally!), we can remember that the Spirit is with us, guiding us along the way.
When we wonder if a person is trustworthy, or if a leader is worth following, we look for the fruit of the Spirit. Do we see love, joy, patience? Is there peace in this? Do they show kindness and faithfulness? Are their words and works and way of living bearing good fruit for the Kingdom?
When we consider a change in field or assignment, we can ask the Lord to show us what fruit this will bear in us. Will we grow in our gentleness or self-control? Will this bring peace to our family? Is there joy here? If we shift, are there people bearing fruit in this new space that we can work with?
When we consider if something is a cultural difference or a sin issue, we can ask ourselves: Is there goodness and kindness here? Is this loving—even if in a way that I don’t recognize naturally? Do I have peace? Do others around this person have peace?
Of course, our hearts can be deceiving. Personal affinity can feel a lot like peace if not fully surrendered to the Lord and confirmed by wise counsel. Fun and excitement and intensity can feel a lot like joy, especially if your personality thrives on those things. Staying put can be confused for faithfulness if you’re a change-averse or conflict-averse person. Allowing someone to continue to do their job poorly, or to continue in a sinful pattern, can masquerade as love and patience if you aren’t careful. Misplaced generosity looks and feels a lot like goodness until you look further down the line.
The deeper truth here is this: learning to recognize the fruit of the Spirit requires pausing, and it requires practice.
Pausing allows us to truly reflect on what we are seeing and feeling, ask the Lord for wisdom, and be sensitive to what we see. We have to stop moving and talking and allow Him to speak! Too often, we are moving so quickly that we fail to see the signs the Lord might be giving us to help us navigate our lives. Regular rhythms of prayer and reflection, ideally that include listening and silence, help mitigate this penchant for productivity and speed.
Practice allows us to more clearly recognize the movement of the Spirit. This might be in community, with trusted mentors or even teammates, as we seek the will of the Lord together. This might simply be in partnership with God, asking Him to highlight the Spirit’s movement to you and grow your discernment like a muscle. Just as a skilled hiker can tell the difference between poisonous mushrooms and nutritious ones, over time and with much prayer we can learn to recognize the fruit of the Spirit as gifts from the Lord for our discernment.
Friends, as we move through this life abroad, remember that the Lord did not leave us to navigate all of our decisions alone. He has given us a helper, and that helper is recognizable through these fruits: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. May you follow hard after these things—and find the consolation of the Spirit waiting for you there.
